The House of Ash

I was researching at the library today for the TV pilot I'm starting to film next week and came across this question in one of the books. It's one of the most provocative questions I've thought about in awhile and I have a few thoughts but first I want to hear what other people's answers are. Here we go:

Imagine that before you entered this life you went through training with a teacher who was the best of the best of the best at a particular focus, and who lived you like a son or daughter. This teacher taught you everything about this focus, reminding you, "you won't remember a thing consciously, but it will all be there in your subconscious, waiting to be reawakened, once you get to Earth and your nature is stimulated to grow." What did this teacher train you to cultivate and grow? Do you remember the part of the training that reiterated: Try and fail a hundred times, rather than playing to small, repeating what you have already perfectly mastered?

So, I'm curious. What was your training?

An owl family has moved into the tree outside my window. I have taken the liberty to name them. Marlena and Fred are the adults and the little ones are Dewie, Lewie and Stewie.

2009 Summer Loves (thus far)

These pictures were taken the day we planted. I now have tiny hints of Indian Corn, Sunflowers, Columbine, Zinnias, Dahlias and Oregano sprouting up all over the place.

- Random art projects... like painting the bookshelves. Finally putting some of my Frida collection to good use!
- Blonde hair

I'm happy to say that June has been a really productive month thus far (and we're only 7 days in!). Last week, I spoke on the "Return to Springboard" panel for the 2009 SpringboardNYC class (who is currently at the Tony Award Rehearsal... JEALOUS!). I spoke a little about what my experiences in this crazy industry have been like so far and the transition from undergrad to grad to real world. I hope it was helpful. It seemed to get great feedback. One of my friends Kahlil Gonzalez-Garcia (who is now in Chapel Hill's MFA Acting Program) was also on the panel along with Illana Becker, who assistant directed "Reasons to be Pretty" on Broadway this season. Springboard people are doing exciting things!

This weekend I finished all of the major FringeNYC publicity/marketing/press information we need and about 20 directing/acting/playwriting submissions to be mailed on Monday. I still have quite a few to go but I've recently discovered the joys of Microsoft Excel spreadsheets, which makes my life (and mailing process) a little bit more organized.

After work yesterday I got to checkout this awesome street fair for "Young Artists and Leaders" produced by Downtown Art (http://downtownart.org/index.html) on the Lower East Side. It was for teens and youth theatre groups, but I was hoping to get some ideas for where we can go with GirlPower in the future. I met some phenomenal groups and saw some great performances. My favorite organization (and I'm ashamed that I never heard of them before yesterday) was called City At Peace (http://cpnational.org/ny/) and I was incredibly inspired to read about what their youth theatre is accomplishing. I had a brief discussion with one of their directors and definitely hoping that we can form some kind of relationship. I would love to incorporate some kind of service component into the GirlPower program next year, like City At Peace does.

That's all for now!

Today:
- Go to Staples and see what they can do about poor lil' red (my laptop)
- Go to Rite Aid (or CVS)
- Watch the Tony's at 8:00 pm tonight!

Am I an artist who does anthropology or an anthropologist who does art?

Because "I like them both", "'Cause I feel like it" and "How is it any of your business if I had 14 liberal arts/humanities majors in undergrad?" are no longer valid answers (and most definitely won't be on my PhD applications), today I will finally attempt to tackle my personal relationship with anthropology and theatre, and the relationship that they have to each other in my twisted Utopian head...

Throughout undergrad and graduate school, I struggled with the fact that according to various experts in the field(s), I was too "anthropology" for theatre and/or too "theatre” for anthropology. Boiled down, what they were attempting to say is they don’ t believe I’m “commercial” enough for many theatrical projects, and I'm too "mainstream" to appeal to many academic audiences.

Like theatre, it is the art of storytelling that draws me to anthropology, and makes me want to pursue higher education in the field. I want to tell stories. I want to read other’s stories, learn about other people’s stories. I want to create my own story.

I refuse to list here the many benefits of a degree in anthropology because it's obvious and easy to see this relationship from an artist’s perspective. After all, having extensive knowledge in anything outside the craft potentially can inform my work. I could also list the benefits of a background in the performing/visual arts for an anthropologist, but once again, there are plenty of articles and websites that already do that, and it seems that also would be a waste of time.

On the most elementary level theatre is about becoming the "other" and/or telling the “other’s” story, whereas anthropology is about studying the "other" and/or telling the “other’s story” (yes, “other” is a problematic term, I know…) but through that lens, the lines between "us" and "them" blurr and eventually disappear. Engaging in the arts also helps us gain a better understanding of our own culture and identity. My involvement in academia, community organizing and activism has led me to question how information, personal agency and awareness of my own community’s struggles are being transmitted to the broader society which may not be as familiar with these issues. Where can an evangelical Christian housewife and transgender street performer find a common connection? Through what methods can we seek discourse between a Palestinian farmer and Israeli school teacher? Through theatre. Theatre is an imperative starting point for new dialogue and giving us hope. This is what theatre and the arts potentially can do. Nothing has informed my theatrical work more than what I've done as an anthropologist. Granted, I'm still young in the field - I'm thankful to have had an incredible mentor who has given me the opportunity to have experiences one would most probably find in graduate school.I look forward to working more on bridging these disciplines.

The things that make me reconsider academia are as follows: I have no desire to be - a pretentious egghead, someone who is so out of touch with the world that they can’t communicate beyond the ivory towers. While there is nothing wrong with this, it’s not me. It never will be. I refuse to lose sight of reality or how what I’m studying can positively affect the real world. Nor do I want to spend the rest of my life in a library regurgitating other people’s theories. I’m not particularly interested in academic publishing as I am in writing for the general public. In fact, every time the anthropology news magazine comes in the mail, it makes me a little sad to know that the amazing information inside will only be seen by people in the field. I definitely think I could do something to change that.

Why I do want to get a PhD: I've been invested in working with the group that I'm proposing to write my dissertation on since undergrad. Though I'm not posting details on my topic up here yet because I'm still working everything out, it deals with theatre in conflict zones. It’s clear that I want to do applied anthropology (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Applied_anthropology ) and that I want to attempt this using theatre and the arts. I want to eventually teach college and publish because I think it's important to empower the next generation of artists/scholars.

I don’t know if these are good enough reasons for wanting to pursue a PhD, I guess in a few months that will be determined. I’m a little frazzled over finding time to take the GRE with all my other projects happening (which, to clarify, I didn’t need to take for my Master’s at NYU because I was in Tisch and they’re too progressive for standardized tests). I once had a professor tell me that PhD’s were for people who can’t sing and dance. I think about this comment often, and while I agree (especially in the context of what we were discussing at the moment) I hope to be the exception to the rule, without sacrificing one for the other.

Today, I signed up for University Settlement's "Health and Wellness Challenge" in which I have pledged (to myself) to loose 10 pounds. I have been adjusting many habits and cutting out sweets (including diet coke which makes me crave sweets). Living in NJ has had a good impact on this, as most everyone in my family is fit (they are at the gym every morning at 5am for 3 hours... no joke). I haven't committed to that *yet* but I should start. To reiterate, University Settlement is where I co-facilitate an after school Arts and Leadership program (a.k.a. job #1).

I have a new job at Battery Park Conservancy. It's great! I've been learning a ton about the environment, conservation and New York City's efforts in creating environmentally friendly parks and recreation spaces. We facilitate great events (that are FREE!) for the community. If you are in the area, you should come by and enjoy it. Not only are the parks gorgeous and right on the water, with the most perfect view of the Statue of Liberty (http://www.bpcparks.org/bpcp/home/index.php). I caught a striped bass at a fishing event last week. I've never caught a fish before. It was small, so I let it go.

Ashley's Striped Bass

One of the coolest things about starting a career in theatre (I think!) is the opportunity to work many different "money jobs" (as they are called in this business). Most people probably don't embrace this as enthusiastically as I do, but I've had some pretty fun (and ridiculous) jobs including:

- Dressing up as a giant Rubix cube in Times Square to promote "The Awesome 80's Prom"
- Jumping out of grounded airplanes to test safety equipment for the FAA (weird, scary, fun)
- Acting as a "Newsie" to promote the Broadway show "Gray Gardens!" (Extra! Extra! Read all about it...)
- Wrapping and shipping props in a prop shop to/from Martha Stewart's tv show set

Right now, I'm just so happy to have jobs and be saving money in this economy. For anyone in need of a money job, playbill.com is a great resource. Craigslist and Idealist are also helpful. However, often the best resource (and the reason I got the new job at Battery Park) is a referral from friends. Ask around and network.

Aside from the commute (which, surprisingly has not been that bad) I would highly recommend living outside of Manhattan. Not only is it cheaper, but it has given me space to decompress and breathe, therefore, I've been getting a lot of reading, writing and editing done. I have also been saving LOTS of money. Most everything is cheaper outside of Manhattan (no more $9 cereal boxes from Gristedes). I have committed myself to no longer eating out at restaurants and spending needless money on food. I know this sounds obvious from both health and money saving perspectives, but ordering out was always the best option for my busy schedule. The habits I'm forming now must stay with me when I move again, which will probably be before the Lab beings.

I will be doing the GRE before the Lincoln Center Directors Lab. I have to. I will not be able to focus (on either) if I don't. I won't lie... I'm not looking forward to the GRE, in fact, I'm dreading it. I did a preliminary verbal GRE and did okay. I do not expect to do well on the quantitative section, as I have not done math since high school. I will not be posting much more on this topic, as it will only lead to me complaining about the ridiculousness of it and how one standardized test reflects nothing about my ability as an anthropologist etc. Kaplan says, "Complaining about the GRE doesn't make your score go up". They are right. It's unnecessary to put bad energy out there.

I've been thinking about changing the title of this blog to "The Director's Life"... but that's a little rigid since I do more than direct. I have also thought about "The Actor's Life", "The Anthropologist's Life", "They Playwright's Life", "The Artivist's Life"... but they are all a little rigid as well. I guess there is no need to box myself. For now, it remains "They Artist's Life".

A woman, who was visibly struggling with a baby carriage, several bags and a toddler boards the train and sits down in the front next to a Wall Street looking man. As the train starts pulling away, the conductor comes around to collect the tickets. This is usually how NJ Transit works. The woman begins searching through her purse frantically, obviously looking for her ticket. She pulls out a May monthly pass and tells the conductor that she has the April monthly pass but can't find it. The conductor says that if she can't show him either a ticket or a monthly pass that she will have to get off and wait for the next train. She pleads with him, explaining that she needs to be at her destination by a certain time and explaining some other things (that I couldn't hear well). The man next to her pulls out a ticket and says to her "Oh, you dropped this. It fell out of your bag", handing the conductor the ticket. The woman was completely shocked and after the conductor left thanked him profusely.

It's nice to know that there are lots of good people out there.

I'm using this subject literally and figuratively.


I have been thinking about ways to bring this blog back to "The Artists Life" a.k.a. surviving and thriving as an "artist" in NYC. I have gone off track by adding articles, etc. Since the tags on the side of this blog are getting a little difficult to organize, so I'm going to be going through and cleaning it up, along with doing more personal updates. I'm bringing up the subject of adding more personal narratives on my blog because according to google analytics, a lot of people are looking for tips on "surviving as an artist in NYC" and apparently I get hits for that. Don't know if I can be helpful, but I'll try to post things here and there on the subject.


Here's the BIG Update:

When I came back from being abroad in March, I realized how out of touch with everything I had become. I was so utterly consumed with trying to pay the rent, produce a bunch of shows, direct, audition, submit for projects, eat, do laundry, etc. that I lose site of being an artist. I was hardly at my best (or even close) for any of it. I knew that I needed to make some big changes so

So, as of 2 weeks ago, I am living in northern NJ (about 1/2 away from NYC). It was the most brilliant move that I've made in a long time. I'm enjoying the woods and deer, and mostly, spending time with my dad (who is a fascinating person... I will talk more about him later). I'm having the chance to get in touch with nature and have been taking walks in the woods every morning. I'm also SAVING LOTS OF money! I will probably be back in an apartment this summer, but to be honest, I don't miss living in Manhattan, especially since I'm here every single day for work and/or rehearsals. I would have no problem having an apartment in the woods and being a part time recluse/NYer.

I'm 1 monologue away from finishing a play that I've been working on for the past 3 years. We're set to debut it in November and I want to workshop it in June (so there was a bit of a deadline). I know that it's finally ready though! Very excited. Also, on the writing topic, I have been making progress on my solo-performance piece "What to Do In Case You Miss The Rapture". I credit the progress that's been made on both these projects to the fact that I have a clear head to actually focus.

Other Updates:

I'm now officially a member of the steering committee for THAW (Theatres Against War). It's a fantastic organization that has done some exciting work over the years. Check out the website at http://www.thawaction.org/ .

COTE got some great publicity from our last production of "My Name is Rachel Corrie". We even made it to Wikipedia (I'm ridiculously excited about this... because I wiki EVERYTHING). http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Name_Is_Rachel_Corrie . We're having one more performance this weekend at Pace University (May 1st) at 8:00pm.

Made it to the interview round for the 2009-2010 McCarter Theater Directing Internship in Princeton, NJ. I should find out in a few weeks whether or not I got in. If I do, I will move to Princeton for 10 months and assistant direct under Emily Mann (and various other guest directors that come through the McCarter). I will also get to direct a one act at the end of the year as part of their Youth Ink! Festival. I'm so thrilled that I had the opportunity to meet Emily Mann (an artist that I've always admired) and speak with her and others at the McCarter Theater about my work. Regardless out the outcome, I feel good about the interview and I'm thrilled for that opportunity.